Will you still remember?

Why are we so worried about being remembered? I wish I knew. I just know that everyone has a desire to know they are thought about.

I first took notice of this while serving a mission for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints down in Ecuador. Many of the people we visited with, whether they were members of the Church or if they had simply spoken with other missionaries, always asked if the other missionaries remembered them. These people carried with them pictures from those missionaries and spoke about them so much but doubted if they were remembered because they hadn't received a letter or a visit from the missionary. (Side note: most of the areas I worked in were so poor that a majority of the people didn't have telephones or internet. There weren't addresses on the houses or on the streets. Letters had to be mailed to other missionaries and delivered to the house, assuming someone in the area still knew the family.)

Others who worry about being remembered are those who lose a loved one too soon in life, especially a child. I have seen comments on other blogs that one way to support a loved one who has lost someone else is to show you remember the one they lost; by talking about them, by celebrating birthdays or anniversaries and such. I have heard these people comment that they worry they are starting to forget the person who has passed on because they didn't think about what to buy them at Easter, they don't know what their favorite food would have been, or because others around them don't remember these dates so special to them.

And still others concerned about whether they are remembered are those struggling with depression and sadness. I'm sure everyone has had at least one moment when they wish someone would notice them or think of them and when no one does, they wonder if others really see or remember them. Those that contemplate suicide often think of all the people they have known and one by one find a reason for that person to not know, wonder, or care about them. That's why many of these people don't call friends or family during these times of sadness and hurt. They feel, for whatever reason, that the other person wouldn't care or wouldn't remember them. They think if no one noticed them before, no one will notice when they are not around.

While I don't know why we are concerned with being remembered, I do believe that Satan uses this feeling and turns it against us. It's a way to make us feel alone and weak. It's a way to make us feel undervalued and forgettable. It's makes us feel unloved.

However, if I stop and think about all the people I have met and remember, I realize we had some sort of connection. And I have to believe that if they also felt a connection to me, they will remember me as well. I may not think of them all on a daily basis and some I may not think about for a long time but eventually with an old letter, a picture, a smell, an activity, an event, or whatever it may be, they are brought back into remembrance.

While I haven't sent a letter to anyone in Ecuador since I was married, I still think of the people there. I think about them often. I wonder what is going on in their lives. Are things better for them? Are they happy? I don't have constant or even regular contact with most of my friends and family but I do think of them. Friends and family who have passed on to the next life, I think of them. I may not remember birthdays or special anniversaries but I do remember the impact they had on my life. I also remember and see the impact they have on the lives of those closest to them.

Many of us use social media to help fight these feelings, but I don't feel like it has the desired effect we are looking for. We use social media to search out old and new friends, to be connected and stay appraised of other's lives but even with all of that we aren't actually making connections. We aren't using social media to "know" people the way we need to in order to feel that we are connected and remembered.

I am challenging myself to send a text, a voice mail, a picture, a thought, a meme, or even make a phone call when I have a memory of a person or run across a photo. Instead of waiting for friends, family or associates to reach out and remember me, I am trying to reach out to show that I remember them.

If you are one who is currently struggling and is feeling like you or someone near you is not being remembered, know that there is someone who remembers you, who loves you and who has a constant reminder of you. Isaiah 49:14-16 (Also 1 Nephi 21:14-16) "But Zion said, The Lord hath forsaken me, and my Lord hath forgotten me. Can a woman forget her sucking child, that she should not have compassion on the son of her womb? yea, they may forget, yet will I not forget thee. Behold, I have graven thee upon the palms of my hands; thy walls are continually before me."